Eulogy

I hope I don't offend anyone with this, but I feel compelled to say that when you write "In Loving Memory Of..." on your car or truck with stickers, it means literally that the vehicle in question is a tribute in locomotion to the memory of a human being. While I know that there are probably some kids out there who thinks it's romantic or tragic to have lost a loved one, I am going to be a humanitarian and give the majority of said sticker eulogizers the benefit of the doubt. I do believe that these people hurt and wish to somehow "sweep the chimney," but it just weirds me out that someone would dedicate a car. I mean, if you accomplish a great deed, or give to charity, or otherwise positively influence the world in tribute to a formerly living person, well, that's something else altogether. Maybe it's some kind of confessional drive. I don't quite understand it. I saw a huge banner today on a delivery truck. One of those big polluting trucks that deliver the jugs of water to businesses. Please, if I die young (and I've noticed that most of the said eulogized usually do) do not dedicate a car to me. Unless it's a really fucking amazing car. And then you have to make sure you get freaky on the hood...in my memory.